So today I was sitting on the patio of a cafe on my laptop when I heard the distant sound of someone starting to play distorted electric guitar. Whoever was playing was absolutely RIPPING right from the jump and I was immediately convinced they’d have to be the sickest rock guitarist in the twin cities or something. Whatever local band they were in, I was their new biggest fan. I closed my laptop to go investigate. I walked a block or so following the sound. It was about 4:30 on a Friday and I was thinking it was someone who got off work early, got home, and was cranking up their amp with the windows open and blowing off steam.

They just sounded so SICK though. I was thinking maybe I could shout up to whatever window was open of their place and say “HEY, WANNA JAM SOMETIME” or something while trying not to weird them out. I kept going another block or two though and realized it wasn’t coming out of a house, it must be a loud setup outdoors or something. Maybe a backyard bbq or a band practice with the garage door open? There was this intense energy to their playing though. With rock music these days most of the cool factor has been blunted but then every once in a while a certain band or player will make that rock energy feel intense and immediate and obvious to the point where it’s not diminished in the slightest. Hey hey, my my.

Another block or two and I realize I’m coming up on Grumpy’s bar and a drummer and bassist cut through. They absolutely rip too. WTF band is this?

I get to Grumpy’s and ask the bouncer what’s going on and is there a cover. He doesn’t know. I poke my head in and see a distinctive mop of white curly hair.

It was Buzz fking Osborne soundchecking and the band was The Melvins.